Whiny wants
I want more hours in the day. I want to be able to stay up late catching up on things. I want to get a full 8-10 hours of sleep. I want to be productive in the mornings and afternoons. I want to get my housework and my 12 pages of chemistry homework done before my husband comes home from work, because I want to give him my undivided attention. I want my freaking uterine lining to shed itself already. I want to be happy and cheery all the time, instead of so freaking BLAH. I want my face to clear up. I want a pony. Well, a horse. I’m a bit too big for a pony.
But you know what I would settle for? Pita chips, hummus, and a big bowl of fruit. Because I didn’t eat lunch until 4:15, and I just got viciously starving for dinner. But it’s too late for a proper dinner, isn’t it? So…baked pita chips, hummus, and fruit. Yum.
Nanny rambles
Why, oh why, oh WHY do I stay up late on Sunday nights? Not only do I have to wake up at 5:43, but I also don’t get home from school until nearly 10:00. And of course, in the hours between, I’ve got to keep up with the energy and demands of a rambunctious 4-year-old boy. I don’t usually write about Thomas on here, but it’s been one long day, and he’s the clearest thing in my head right now.
These days, for better or worse, I’m not alone at work. The bosses have sold their business, and they’re both currently at home a lot. This has led to a few super-easy days (Let’s All Go To Mommy’s Ultrasound And Great-Grandpa’s Urologist Day! Let’s Go Sit At The Doctor’s Office For Three Hours And Find Out That Thomas Has Strep Throat Day! Let’s Go To Karate/Gymnastics Class Day!), but it’s also led to a lot of fits and whining. If Thomas doesn’t like something, he goes running to the office to bother his parents. He doesn’t want me, he wants them. Again, there’s a good and a bad side to this. The good? I managed to not get strep throat from the kid, because he didn’t want to snuggle with me. The bad? He doesn’t understand that they’re actually doing business when they’re in the office, and he thinks that every day is a super happy funtime weekend.
Also? He’s four now, and he’s absolutely brilliant and terribly (yet hilariously) cheeky.
“I don’t want to sit down, Thomas.” Daddy leans against the kitchen counter. “I’m going to stand right here and wait for you to finish your strawberries”
“Okay, Daddy.” Thomas leans against the refrigerator. “I’m going to stand right here and watch you be patient.“
I took some photos of Thomas today while he was taking pictures with my old camera. It’s not really old at all, as I got it 2 months ago, but he’s taken more pictures with it than I have. Anyway, while I was reviewing the photos, I gasped at how OLD he looks now. There’s hardly a trace of the little munchkin I started watching 2 years ago. He’s a little boy now. He’s a kid. He’s growing up. My god, is he growing up.
He looks serious in the pictures I took, because he’s concentrating on his own photography. He works really hard at setting up the exact shot that he wants. It’s why I’ve pretty much given him free reign with the camera. I want to encourage this trait in him, because it reminds me of how I always was as a kid. I don’t want to hold him back if he’s got such meticulous interest in it. And, if I do say so myself, the kid has some talent. I wouldn’t dare let him touch MY! FANCY! NEW! CAMERA! but I’ll certainly let him play with the Kodak EasyShare (which I purchased at CVS for less than $30 out of pocket after clever use of coupons and ECBs BECAUSE I AM AWESOME!) to his little heart’s content.
Hello, February!
My god, that feels weird. Also? Only 13 more weeks left in this semester! Hurrah! I’ve become a bit eh about school, a bit burned out. I think part of the problem is that, last semester, I focused entirely on it, and let everything else in my life fall into disrepair. Cleaning? No time, have to study! Cooking? But I’ve been out of the house all day! My marriage? You know I’ve got to get As to get into nursing school! Best friend? I can’t hang out, I’ve got a quiz tomorrow and a test on Wednesday!
And so on. And so on. And so on.
So, to paint a clearer picture of my life at the moment: my house is more of a wreck than it ever has been, my eating habits have returned to process crap, I’ve gained back all the weight that I lost last year, plus 7 pounds, my marriage hit the roughest patch ever (but we’re working on it, and are quite happy at the moment), and I rarely talk to my best female friend anymore.
And that 6-week break I had between semesters? I was so tired from last semester that I did…well, practically nothing. The entire time. It’s not something I’m proud of.
Anyway, I’m taking two classes this semester, and I’m trying to figure out a way to balance that and also get my life back in order, because, frankly, it can’t go on like this. And so, somehow, I’ve decided that I’m going to write on here every single day this month. Not because I’m a glutton for punishment, but because I really do feel better when I’m able to write. So…that’s the plan.
And with that, I think it’s time for me to shower and head to my parents’ house for a Super Bowl party. But just between you and me? I’m really only going so that I can watch the special episode of The Office on the more-gigantic-than-ever-would-be-necessary television that my father owns. Oh, and to cheer on whichever team no one else in the room is supporting. Which I think will be…the Steelers?
